Last Friday, I praised a client who has changed amazingly in the time I’ve known her.  But it’s what she’s done that counts; and this is what I was praising her for.

Then I asked the question I always wonder about when people decide to take a journey of self-discovery.  The question is: How did you find the courage to face your problems and begin this journey?

She thought a bit; then replied: I wanted to be honest with myself and I wanted self-understanding.  And I think I knew what I wanted to be like, but I didn’t know how to get there.  But that’s when I realised I had to confront my past, and figure it out. 

This was an impressive answer, (something I have come to expect from this young woman). 

But for me, it still didn’t answer the question.  So I asked again: But how did you find the courage to do this?  Where did that courage come from; the courage that made you want to change?

She replied: I don’t know.  I guess I didn’t want to be what I was becoming, and deep-down I wanted to be successful.  But there’s no shortcut in life.  To be successful, you have to be courageous and honest with yourself.  It was really like this – success means you have to face your fears.

But then this raises the question - why do some people face their fears, and others not?  The client I was praising had a really tough start in life, and then lots more adversity besides.  So what makes her different?  What gives her the courage to confront all of this?

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